Where are the little green men and my picnic baskets?

Aye, i want an answer....an answer to who stole my picnic baskets? couldnt have been yogi bear cause he cant be in every country of the world. So i believe it was aliens who stole my picnic baskets.....the little green men in flying saucers with ray guns and ways to make u fly. Such a cliched statement is it not?

Aliens have been hounding us for centuries, oh wait, alien sightings and UFOs. are they really out there? Do they really abduct us and perform weird sexual experiments on us.......i dunno but ill try and answer those questions. Firstly, its a bit hard to believe that ET is out there, teasing us with the occasional appearance. If aliens do exist, why do they keep coming in small bursts and disappearing after the photo shoot? might as well hover for an hour over New York and end the pointless speculation? Secondly, why does every alien have to be small, green with large black eyes and a thin frame.....i would put on my bet on different races of aliens.....u know white black yellow whatever....and they cant all be thin! Some of them gotta eat too eh?!! The point is its kinda easy to disprove 99% of alien sightings simply on the fact that all the sightings are too common to each other, same alien bodies, same flying saucer story and the occasional anal probing without lubricant for abductees.

Of course, Hollywood seems to have jumped on the bandwagon and released hundreds of movies and TV shows.....and fortunately most of them were miserable failures. Fortunately cause a man can only watch a certain amount of alien movies before going totally insane! The flying saucer story caught my eye because i always thought, out of all the cool, mad shapes and technology, why the HELL would aliens use a flying saucer......there was a doco out sometime back on reverse engineering an alien spacecraft (hypothetical situation). An aerospace engineer pointed out that a flying saucer, shaped as it is, would be pretty darn useless and not easy to fly, hmm....intelligent alien creatures that can travel at light speed and or create wormholes, but cant construct an efficient flying spacecraft!

I have never seen or met an alien and honestly, i reckon the number of alien sightings are decreasing.....havent heard many this year! might be a good sign that we wont get invaded in the new future.........ahhhhh thats great news for me cause i can still plan my trip to the Bahamas in 10 years time. well ciao and peace out!